Monday, 17 November 2008

I hate it when...

I hate it when I have a really great idea and then I misplace it like sunglasses or car keys.

For example, I was heading down the I-35 at 70 m.p.h. to Sulphur, Oklahoma for my weekend yoga retreat when I finally punctured through one of the last remaining blocks on my comedy pilot. As I recall it was a brilliant piece of physical theater that neatly tied in with something in the cold opening. And because of its unarguable brilliance there was no need to write it down. No need, whatsoever. Especially not doing 70 miles per hour in rural Oklahoma, at dusk. I mean if I had had a wreck I would have found myself in a Stephen King novel, and who wants that, especially when you can have a yoga weekend instead? Comedy pilots don't get finished in Stephen King novels, in fact comedy in all its resplendent forms is banned in Stephen King novels. So if a purveyor of fine humor is found trespassing, even by (car) accident in a Stephen King novel the consequences are quite severe. And that's an understatement. Let's just say that Kathy Bates and her sledgehammer is just a warm up. Caan gets off lightly. Seriously, If Jack is all play and no work, where's the story in that? Shelly Duval shivering in a meat locker with a knife makes perfect sense because, a.) meat lockers are cold, and b.) you need a knife to hack off a shoulder of mutton. It's just not scarry, unless you are a vegan. But then you would react with outrage, not fear. You would sublimate all that white middle-class guilt that made you want to be a vegan in the first place into organizing a grassroots campaign. And you would drive to the protest that you and your college buddies organized in the Honda Civic Hybrid that your parents are making payments on, wearing the Simple Shoes your grandma bought you at the mall last summer. And there's just no story in that. None.

Friday, 14 November 2008

The Temp

Well, I'm temping so I thought I would use this time wisely to update my blog. Seriously. I keep asking my superiors what to do next b/c anyone who knows me can attest to the fact that I am a bit of a whirling Dervish. I'm still working on the kindergarten basics of "sit still, keep your mouth shut and get your hands out of you panties." Add to that that I am a bit paranoid at times so when I am "not looking busy" I feel guilty and instead of guilt it looks like nervousness. This has its upside, though. I tend to achieve a lot, although I often head into that dark place known as burnout.

So my blog has been really lame recently. Apologies to all 8 of my regular readers. I had to resort to cutting and pasting emails from my friend Lee who provided all of the interesting content. He is much smarter-er than I. BUT! I am smart enough to get him. In fact my sitcom is based on our friendship, or was in its first version, but now with the re-write for the US version he has been written into a corner, sort of. Withall, he is my muse, which does not sound right as he is a bloke, so he is my man-muse.

I'm in full throttle on the final draft of my sitcom pilot, working title: Hotpants which means early AM wake ups (between 3-5am) to write before going to work at 8. My deadline (the deadline is for me) is 28 November which is also my birthday where I will be # years old. (My God it's come to that, I'm # years old and I don't want to tell you and I don't want to lie, although anyone who is reading this probably knows that I am # years old.) It is my present to me. And, my mentor will introducing me to "her people" in the new year. So I have to start working on my spec script right after that. I'm deadlining a beatsheet for the first of the year. Hands full.

Today was a 3AM day, which would not be too bad, except that I stayed up way late packing to go away for the weekend. I am overtired and headed for burnout which is good as I am going on a yoga retreat. This is in part to rest and relax and also to practice the many yoga, raw food, Esselen, Hoffman & etc. weekends that I will no doubt be doing when I am hired to write on big TV comedies. Just another example of what an over achiever I am, I'm practicing resting and relaxing. I plan to be a really good at this when I get that job.

And on that note